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Borderline Personality Disorder Demystified, Revised Edition: An Essential Guide for Understanding and Living with BPD-Robert O. Friedel

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The authoritative guide to understanding and living with borderline personality disorder, now fully revised and updated Millions of Americans suffer from borderline personality disorder (BPD), a psychiatric condition marked by extreme emotional instability, erratic and self-destructive behavior, and tumultuous relationships. Though it was once thought to be untreatable, today researchers and clinicians know that there is every reason for hope. Dr. Robert Friedel, a leading expert and pioneer in pharmacological treatment for BPD, combines his extensive knowledge and personal experience into this comprehensive guide. Borderline Personality Disorder Demystified shares: The latest findings on the course and causes of the disorder Up-to-date information on diagnosis An accessible overview of cutting-edge treatment options For those who have been diagnosed and those who think they may have the illness, and for the family and friends who love and support them, this book illuminates new information and points the way to an ever more hopeful future. The revised edition includes new forewords from Donald W. Black, MD, and Nancee S. Blum, MSW, and family educators James and Diane Hall.

Book Borderline Personality Disorder Demystified, Revised Edition: An Essential Guide for Understanding and Living with BPD Review :



I find the author's account of his own sister, Denise, troubling.I have a distinct feeling he is leaving out the possibility that his own sister had been scapegoated or neglected by her own parents. For example, his mother claims her birth was exceptionally difficult-- did she subconsciously blame her daughter for her own difficulties, and neglect proper care of her as an infant? His narrative makes it sound like Denise was "the bad seed". My experience leads me to believe that scapegoating and favoritism is rife in very large families.EDIT: Reading further, it's a great book. It has a lot of great information that rings true if you know of someone with this disorder. However, I can't help but feel that there is a black hole of denial in this book where the impact of being raised by a BPD caretaker is completely ignored. He likes to repeat that it is biological and inherited, but neglects to reflect on the impact a BPD parent would have on a child or adult. He repeats his Catholic grandmother's "wisdom" that children are "born bad" or "good". He likes to repeat the BPD as bad seed scenario where the infant child is somehow too "fussy and difficult" for the mother to bond with, implying that it is the infant's innate defectiveness is justification for emotional neglect and/or abandonment by the mother. Being a mother myself, I'd say the mother has a problem that needs to be addressed if she doesn't bond with her child, I don't care how many drugs are used during childbirth. Is he subconsciously trying to exonerate his mother for his sister's childhood behavior-- particularly since childhood abandonment and lack of bonding seems to be linked to BPD in adulthood?The author doesn't seem to quite want to acknowledge the reality that a BPD person will most likely have a BPD mother or father-- and that parent will likely project his or her disorder onto their children from infancy, whether the child has a genetic predisposition or not. BPD parents will "split" their own children. Being "split" as all bad by a BPD parent will inevitably cause major psychological distress for a child while growing up (hello, Denise?)If a young child exhibits BPD behavior, he or she could possibly not have a genetic predisposition for that disorder, he or she could just be mirroring their parent's unusual emotional outbursts, bizarre thinking, paranoia, depressive symptoms.The description of BPD behavior in children also concerns me. Not that I don't think the ideas are valid, however-- I don't think the parents should be the ones who evaluate whether their own children have BPD. If a child is BPD, and the disorder is highly inheritable, that means at least one parent is likely to have the disorder. How can a BPD parent accurately diagnose their own child? A BPD mother or father will most definitely mis-label any natural independent inclination of their children as disobedience, bizarre thinking, sickness and evidence of psychopathy, particularly on a child when they are "splitting" that child. BPD parents are probably more likely to fear abandonment BY their children, they will see independence and normal growth as abandonment, project their misperceptions onto their children, want to have enmeshed relationships with their children, have paranoid delusions about their children, therefor their concept of appropriate behavior of their children is likely to be skewed.For example, an 18 year old wanting to go out on a first date would likely be interpreted as "excessive sexual promiscuity" to a BPD parent. A teenager coming home 30 minutes late after working at McDonalds might be "evidence" of "using drugs" to a BPD parent-- if they even allow the teenager to work. BPD parents will read diaries and obsessively track the phones of their young adult children and are very willing to diagnose their children as mentally ill when they are actually healthy. Healthy children = abandoned parents.
Not even making this up. My Borderline spouse shredded this book and threw it at me! If that's not a great endorsement, I can say that this is a very nicely researched book, written for laypersons but very well supported with additional citations and materials. If you're challenged/blessed to be close to a BPD, this might be the best book you'll ever find.

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